OPINION: She called me at home

OPINION —

Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! (triple exclamation marks intended)

She called my house.

My. House. 

She called me. I couldn't believe it when I heard her voice as she introduced herself into my ear.

Janie Hinman — you know, the wife of area MLA-hopeful and Wildrose Independence Party leader Paul Hinman. Janie..or Jamie  (she said it kind of quickly like we were already good friends, so I'm not sure if it's like the one in the Aerosmith song that had a gun, or scream-queen Ms. Curtis of Halloween horror movie fame — but whatever) — she called my house and introduced herself by name ... one of them ... to me.

I said, "Wow! This is a pleasure! (again with the intended exclamation marks showing my awe-struck-ed-ness to the unexpected call right when my family was having supper on Wednesday night) How's the weather where you are? It's pretty co-..."   But she cut me off and started talking about the Wildrose's plans for independence, freedom and her hubby's leadership goals to attain both.

Rude, I thought at first — but I let it slide as she was actually calling me. Mrs. Hinman was calling my house. Wow.

So I let her go on with a few more words of praise for her hubby. She seems to like him a lot.

In a pause, I quickly asked how she would feel about moving with him to Lac La Biche if he was elected as our next MLA.

She didn't seem to hear the question and continued with a light bashing of all other parties and a bit of a finger-wagging directed at those who didn't want freedom and independence from oppressive national leaders.

It was about then that I thought something was up.  She was either very rude, hard of hearing ... or, hey wait a minute. Forget Jamie or Janie ... was this even a real person?  Was it a a robo-call?  Could I have been fooled by the soft and energetic voice of the wife of the man of the leader of the party who wanted my vote? 

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.  (no exclamation marks this time) What a waste of my time ... and probably hers ... and the recording studio who put the voice-piece together... and Alexander Graham Bell for inventing the telephone.

I hung up.  And even though I knew it was just a recorded message of little value, (not even one that started with an air-horn and the promise of a free Pacific Cruise Lines vacation or Westjet travel incentive) it felt wrong. I had hung up on her in mid-freedom rant. I felt bad.

For a second.

Until I realized that I'd fallen right into their trap. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. They're so sneaky.

They have to know that these tactics don't work. Who listens to an automated voice spew propaganda for minutes? And if a robotic, one-sided conversation actually keeps someone's attention, is that person really a good benchmark to measure support?

Right?

So instead, I'm guessing that on the other end of all calls that the Wildrose gang sends out over the coming days, there is an army of interns counting the hang-ups ... and applauding each one.

"That's another Albertan expressing their freedom to do as they see fit, Mr. Hinman," they will yell across the campaign office. "Wait .. two, three, fourfivesixseveneight-and-nine more. Yes!! Freedom!! Freedom always wins!!! They love you sir!!" (exclamation marks assumed).

If this little article made you upset ... Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh ... Relax a little.

Like the robo-call I received from Mrs. Hinman, it's just a pile of silly words running together that mean nothing if you don't want them to. It's not intended to change your vote or push an agenda ... or promote Aerosmith songs. It's just another piece of election debris floating around the region for you to grab, avoid or, like annoying phone calls, disconnect from.

If you're voting on March 15 in the Fort McMurray-Lac La Biche provincial by-election, vote how you see fit. You're free to do that. No one — real or robo — has taken that freedom away from you.